Youth Board member Ottilie shares her experiences of Tender’s strategy launch at Portcullis House.
On Monday 18th March 2024, I attended a parliamentary briefing at Portcullis House for the launch of Tender’s new strategy for the prevention of domestic abuse and sexual violence throughout the UK.
We heard from Jess Philips MP – our host for the event – alongside domestic abuse commissioner Nicole Jacobs, Director of the Vulnerability Knowledge and Practice Programme (VKPP) Gareth Edwards, teachers working in specialist and mainstream school settings, and students themselves who have taken part in Tender’s workshops. It was an absolute honour to attend alongside three fellow members of the Tender Youth Board – Gaia, Ryan and Zainab – two of whom spoke powerfully at the event in conversation with Tender CEO Susie McDonald.
As a new member of the Youth Board, it was a fairly nerve-wracking event at first. As soon as the event began, however, an impassioned introduction by Jess Philips incited a much deeper feeling of anger and frustration in me at the continued lack of long-term investment in young people’s sex education. She spoke candidly of the harrowing cases brought into her office on a daily basis, and it was terrifying how such extreme offences have become commonplace. I believe that Jess’s call to action, whilst powerful, is only strong if those in power choose to listen and implement the pillars of prevention that Tender is asking for.
Gareth Edwards presented an extract of the 2022 National Analysis of Police-Recorded Child Sexual Abuse and Exploitation (CSAE) Crimes Report. This gave me a shocking insight into the rising levels of child-on-child abuse, which is now estimated to account for half of recorded CSAE offences (NPCC, 2024). This statistic alone highlighted the necessity for integrated RSHE as a specialist subject in schools. As a 24-year-old who only left university a few years ago, it was scary to learn how many 16–25-year olds aren’t aware of the signs of coercion in a relationship. I think this goes both ways – those who aren’t aware they are being coerced but also perpetrators that do not realise their behaviour is wrong. In an age of social media where porn is heavily used as a form of sex education for young people, why are we surprised when we see that levels of domestic abuse and sexual violence are on the rise? (Navarro-Prado, Silvia et al, 2023)
Specialist teachers working with pupils facing permanent exclusion from mainstream education, alongside Ryan’s account of his experiences within the care system, further opened my eyes to the levels of social, systemic injustice that lets down the most vulnerable children in our society. One of the teachers spoke about how Tender’s workshop supported two young people to open up about experiences they may never have otherwise disclosed, which is a small but important step in the right direction. No child should be forgotten in the pursuit of the prevention of domestic abuse and sexual violence, and Tender’s call to action at this event was one step towards supporting all young people regardless of their background to learn and model healthy relationships.
It was so wonderful to be in a room of people committed to a shared cause, and I felt a sense of allyship and community throughout. Representing Tender at this event was a very special opportunity, and as heavy as the conversations may have been, there was so much hope and resistance in the room. I believe if this strategy is listened to and implemented, we are truly making a change for the next generation to thrive, communicate, empathise and learn from one another.
Find out more about Tender’s Youth Board.
Find out more about Tender’s new strategy.
